The Relationship people was founded by Jenny and Nigel Heath. I am grateful to them for the hard work they invested and the excellent work they did with clients. Finding they shared a simlar ethos to me, I worked along side them for a transitional period before taking over when they retired in 2016.
I am a father to two grown up daughters and have been a foster parent in the past. I have extensive experience of supporting individuals, Couples and families with a range of issues.
What Motivates Me ?
Having previously worked in retail after leaving school I discovered in my thirties that I had a heart for working with people and started to do voluntary work and some study. I had lost motivation at school and taken a career route that came my way at the time. I gave little thought to the options there may have been out there. On reflection I can see that my family circumstances contributed, though I don't have too much to moan about and am a believer in the idea that at the right time you will find yourself and grow. I gained lots of life experience along the way.
My voluntary work and study led me into Social work training and having worked mainly with young offenders, mostly supporting and guiding parents I decided to branch out into independent work which evolved into the private service I now run. While I gained valuable experience, including later on working part time for the child and adolescent mental health service, I find I can be more effective and meet the needs of my clients more effectively working independently.
Approach and ethos
My approach is very positive, helping people find their strengths and tapping into motivation that may have been laying dormant. In my experience people get stuck and fall into problematic patterns for a wide variety of reasons. Sometimes we need someone who is not emotionally attached but with the right experience to help them find the way forward. I often say to people, it is about what you chose to do, not the agenda of others. Many people are tied up with ought's and should's, so it is little wonder that attempts to fit in with others or find themselves. Some clients face great difficulties in dealing with the legal and child protection services, for example in child contact cases. My knowledge and experience in this area places me well to help them to negotiate the challenges this presents.
Over the years I have developed a range of approaches which I adapt to the individual, adult, child, young person or couple or family I am working with. This is based on experience, research, training and what I have found people can relate and respond to. My approach draws mainly on the fundamental principles of assertive communication, which are well documented as effective for individual functioning and in relationships. I combine this with Cognitive based work, you may have heard of Cognitive Beahavioural Therapy (CBT) which in a nut shell looks at how our thought processes interact with our emotions and actions, influencing the decisions we make.
Most of all I bring a belief in peoples capacity to thrive, a sensitive, supportive, non judgmental approach. Within this supportive environment, you and or those you care about who are engaging in the work will be challenged to make changes and perhaps step out of comfort zones.
The work includes elements of counseling. However it is primarily practical, solution focused and combined with advice and guidance based on years of experience .The past is not dwelt on in this approach, but is touched on in as much as it is helpful in identifying the current problems and contributing to finding a way forward. I can promise a thorough yet short term, cost effective approach.
Whether the area you need help in is for you, your partner, you and your partner, a child or young person or other family member, the way forward will be discussed at the outset and along the way, you will be in control of the process, including the length, which I keep to a minimum, while being thorough.
You may be unsure if I can help, or be unsure about exactly what you or the person, or child you are concerned about needs, or may just want to chat through the options, please feel to ring or text or email with an enquiry and make the most of the free initial phone consultation.
Clearly you or those I am working with will need to feel that you can discuss a range of issues and they will be kept in the room. If I feel it would be helpful to share a particular issue with someone, for example a parent or partner, or involve them directly in the work, I would only do so with your permission. As will all professionals in any helping, teaching or caring capacity I have a duty to pass on anything that suggests that you or another person is at risk in some way. On the very rare occasion this may happen it is handled in a sensitive way and which would be discussed. I would highlight that experience shows that the relevant authorities respond proportionally.
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